Pussy High: The Journey Begins

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Today I wrote the first draft of the first episode of Pussy High.  I am not very experience with writing scripts or making films.  It’s going to take a lot of work to get this first episode done.  But I have the dolls, I have the camera, and I have the toy high school ready!

I’ve decided that for the time being my Kitty Glitter persona is dead. I wrote one new story under that name recently, it was called Strung Out On Cum.  I wrote it with the intention of submitting it to a zine called Underbelly.  They ended up rejecting it.  I may submit it somewhere else, I think it’s a pretty cool story.

I achieved a lot under the Kitty Glitter name.  I wrote Wesley Crusher: Teenage Fuck Machine, the most legendary Star Trek fan fiction ever.  I also destroyed Chuck Wendig and made him cry by writing  Soy Wars: The Soylence Of The Lambs.

Kitty Glitter has done enough.  It’s time to move on.

Since I’ve been doing The Pussy Centipede podcast under the name name Pussy Tantrum I decided that my creator name for Pussy High will be Cum Carmichael.

Cum Carmichael’s Pussy High!

Get ready fuckface!

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My Screenwriting Journey #5: Outlining

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For the fifth part of my screenwriting class I was supposed to do a general plot outline with a three act structure.

I did this for the film I plan to make called Night Of The Fiends.

So here is my rough outline.

Once the movie is made it will be cool for people to see its gay beginnings in this outline:

Act One:

1950s Hollywood:

A feral cat named Meowa wakes up to find that her kitten is missing.  There is a note written in blood saying that her kitten has been taken to The House Of The Demons and will be sacrificed.  Meowa needs to find her way to The House Of The Demons but she can’t drive, so she has to trick humans into driving her there.  Meowa is aware of the house’s location because it’s a famous haunted house in town.

At the same time up and coming actor James Dean is humiliated by his idol Marlon Brando who tells him he’ll never have the life experience to become a great actor.

Meowa happens to overhear this incident and decides to use it to her advantage by drawing up fake invitations to a party at a haunted house and leaves them for James Dean to find.

Act Two:

James Dean falls for Meowa’s ruse and gets a group of his friends to drive to the haunted house hoping that he’ll get some life experience from being around ghosts.  Meowa hitches on to the back of the car.

The car gets into a crash after the driver notices Meowa hanging off the roof.

Meowa is forced to explain herself although she is only able to communicate with meowing.

The group makes it to the house where they are promptly slaughtered by the Satanic cult members.

Act Three:

James Dean and Meowa manage to kill the cult members and find her kitten, but then a demon comes through a portal and grabs the kitten.

James Dean is injured trying to fight the demon and Meowa sacrifices herself in battle with the demon.

James Dean escapes with the kitten, he is saddened by the death of Meowa, but he now has the life experience to become a great actor.

The kitten and James Dean drive to Marlon Brando’s house and throw eggs all over it, then they drive away laughing.

 

My Screenwriting Journey #4

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The fourth section of my screenwriting class is focused on creating characters.

I am going to post the assignment here, and what I came up with for it.

Try doing this exercise yourself, you might have fun and learn something about yourself bro:

Let’s create a character! We’re all going to start at the same place—with a conflict:

She’s got a wonderful life, the one she always planned for. And she’s about to take the last step that’s going to make everything perfect. But it’s days away from that cherished completion, and she’s torn between going ahead and fulfilling her dreams or throwing it all away on something she’s always hated the thought of.

And the rest is . . . yours! Who is this woman, and what’s the life she’s always wanted? What is she about to get or become or do, and what is the thing she’s tempted to throw it all away for?

No need for an elaborate biography—just something like we did for Judge Mary in Chapter 3. And when you’re done, put it up in the Discussion Area and see how different—or how similar—your character is to those of your classmates!

This is what I came up with:

Sue Tissue has been working on her piano compositions for years and is ready to release her debut album.  Preview copies of the album are already generating a lot of good buzz with the music press.  Then a strange girl contacts Sue online.  It turns out that when Sue was a teenager she had a deranged obsession with building a tiny gladiator Colloseum.  An arena designed to pit hamsters and mice in life or death combat against gladiator kittens.  Sue spent her whole life trying to overcome her sick urges to torture animals in this manner, but this deranged young girl has come across Sue’s old website that had her Colloseum blueprints posted on it.  This girl has some suggestions to bring her Colloseum to life, and also has access to an endless supply of kittens, hamsters, and mice.

Against her better judgement, Sue feels tempted to join this girl in building the tiny Colloseum and finally living out her sick childhood dreams.  But this would mean missing out on the concert tour that was meant to support the debut of her piano album, and it would also mean putting herself at risk of being arrested for animal cruelty. 

What will Sue decide?

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My Screenwriting Journey #3: Conflict

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For the third part of my screenwriting class we learned about conflict, and our assignment was to take an internal conflict and make it dramatic.  This was what I did for mine:

Single mother Mary’s child is ready for school—but should she send the kid to the public elementary, which might not provide a good enough platform for future success (or might be substandard or even dangerous, if you choose), or to the private school, which is far too expensive for Mary’s income?

Single mother Mary can’t afford tuition for her son’s private school so she is forced to send him to the local school which has been taken over by violent kid gangs.  Her son barely makes it through the first day without being murdered and as she is picking him up from school a local pimp overhears Mary telling her son that she’d do anything to have the money to send him to private school.  The pimp sees that Mary is young and hot and he offers her a deal, he will pay her son’s private school tuition and let her work off the debt by turning tricks for him.  Mary feels that she has no other choice so she takes the pimp’s deal.

Mary ends up becoming the pimp’s best hooker and he gives her all his best clients, this enrages the pimp’s former best girl and she confronts Mary, threatening to slash her face and ruin her good looks if she doesn’t quit being a hooker.  So Mary is caught in a bad position, she can’t break her deal with the pimp, and she likes having her son be safe, so she decides her best option is to murder the other hooker and dispose of her body.  Then her pervy neighbor sees Mary disposing of the body and blackmails her into having sex with him.  Mary confesses everything to the pimp and it turns out he has fallen in love with her.  The pimp agrees to murder her neighbor and get rid of his body but only if Mary agrees to marry him.

Another twist is that Mary’s son turns out to be a violent psycho who ends up skipping school to hang out with the kid gang members at the public school.  This eventually leads Mary and her son on a collision course where Mary is forced to take out the son she became a hooker to save.

 

I think this movie would be called A Pimp’s Deal and I think Katy Perry would be good to play Mary.

Superstar: The Karen Carpenter Story

Superstar: The Karen Carpenter Story was an early short film by Todd Haynes that was released in 1987.

It told the story of legendary pop singer Karen Carpenter, using Barbie dolls and random documentary footage.  Because Mr. Haynes used songs by The Carpenters illegally, he was sued by Karen’s brother Michael Carpenter, and lost the ability to distribute the film in 1990.

Since then the film has been passed around through the underground and eventually made its way onto Youtube.

I started taking a screenwriting class recently, and decided on writing a screenplay about a cat who teams up with James Dean to fight a demon inside of a haunted house.  I originally thought I’d write something that I would try to sell, but realized that I wouldn’t be able to write the type of movie I’d want to see if I had to worry about selling it to a producer.

So once the script is done I am going to make my own film using dolls.  The film is going to be called Night Of The Fiends, and I think it’s going to be awesome.  It’s going to feature one of my original characters, a writer named Cuck Wendig who appears in my book Soy Wars.

Superstar: The Karen Carpenter story will be my inspiration!

 

My Screenwriting Journey #2: Patterns, Goals, and Obstacles

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For the second lesson in my screenwriting class we learned about what makes a story.  The reading dealt with patterns, the heroic journey, character goals, and the obstacles characters face.

The focus of the lesson seems to be this idea:

A story follows a character as he or she tries to overcome obstacles in order to achieve a goal.

One of the exercises was to put your iPod on shuffle and form a story from the first ten song titles that pop up.  This was mine:

Sad 2

I’ll Be Faithful To You

Fall Behind Me

I’ll Fly Away

Denis

Sweetie

This Old House

The Money Will Roll Right In

One Of Us

Sharks Can’t Sleep

This is the story I came up with based on these titles:

Two sad pilots both believe they are being cheated on by their wives and have fallen behind in their mortgage payments.  A french criminal named Denis offers them money to fly him under the ocean with an experimental submarine plane in order to steal a treasure from an old undersea house that is guarded by a gang of sharks.  A shark named Sweetie eats Denis and the plane.  One of the pilots decides to stay behind and fight the sharks, sacrificing himself and distracting the sharks long enough to give the other pilot a chance to escape to the surface with the treasure.

The other assignment was to come up with a character and show what their goal, obstacles, and stakes were.  So this is what I came up with:

It’s 1950’s Hollywood and a feral cat must overcome her fear of humans so she can get help rescuing her kitten from a group of Satan worshippers.

This idea evolved from my original idea to write a movie about James Dean having to spend the night in a demon haunted house.  I decided to make the main character be a feral cat, and the cat will have to enlist the aid of James Dean to save her kitten from the Satan worshippers and also fight a demon.  I’m sure this idea will continue to change as I progress through the course.

My Screenwriting Journey #1: The Beginning

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I started taking this cheap online screenwriting class.  I watch a lot of movies so I figured it would be cool to try writing one of my own.

For the first assignment we had to write a one sentence concept for a movie, so this is mine:

It’s 1954 in Hollywood and James Dean must overcome his fear of the supernatural so that he can spend the night in a demon haunted house to win the respect of Marlon Brando.

I plan to call this movie Night Of The Fiends.  My actual idea, beyond this one sentence concept, is a lot more bizarre and it involves kitties, but I couldn’t really work that into the simple one sentence concept restriction.

So I hope you will join me on my screenwriting journey and see where it goes!