Where The Cunt Blood Enters The Heart is back!

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A few months ago a famous author got me banned from every publishing platform.  I don’t know if I’ll ever get around to making all my books available again but Where The Cunt Blood Enters The Heart is one of the most important and bunniest books I ever wrote.  It’s not available again my Payhip store under the Bunnula Publishing imprint.

Why not click here to get your copy today!

Excerpt From The Wet Clits

It can be hard to get people to take an interest in your books when you’re an underground, self-published author from the streets.

Not everybody has a big machine behind them pushing their work to the masses.

I published my first novel The Wet Clits a few months ago and have struggled to get people to read it.  I thought I’d post this excerpt here to show how silly it is, to show that it’s something you should be reading:

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“How’s that?” Doctor of Bunnies said.

“You said you’d make a million billion noise complaints,” Clitney laughed.

“Hey! Don’t laugh at me,” Doctor of Bunnies said, “to be honest I was too busy tending to my bunny patients to make a billion million phone calls, but rest assured, seven thousand noise complaints are sufficient to ruin you in this town. Mwah ha ha!”

“Arr!” Monster of Frankenstein, “no threaten my friend!”

Then Monster of Frankenstein threw Doctor of Bunnies down the driveway and ran to the pink house covered with bunny faces.

“I shall have you charged with assault, you green vagabond,” Doctor of Bunnies said as he brushed the dirt from his fur.

Monster of Frankenstein used his hands to smash through the walls of Doctor of Bunnies’ house. He systematically tore the house to pieces, leaving nothing but a pile of pink bunny-face rubble.

As Monster of Frankenstein sorted through the rubble he saw a box of VHS tapes.

“Hey,” Doctor of Bunnies said, “don’t touch those tapes!!!”

Clitney ran over to Monster of Frankenstein and looked at the tapes. They were labeled in pink marker Shy Little Kittens Volumes 1-69.

“Hey!” Clitney said, “this is kitty porn.”

“Please don’t tell on me,” Doctor of Bunnies said, as tears soaked his face fur.

But when the cops came to investigate the noise complaint Clitney and the Monster did tell on Doctor of Bunnies. In the future he went to trial in bunny court and the bunny judge sentenced Doctor of Bunnies to a billion million years in bunny prison.

If you enjoyed this excerpt just click the link in my menu that goes to my books for sale page and please buy a copy.

Support indie art!

Exclusive Excerpt From Call Me By Your AIDS!

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Call Me By Your AIDS is my newest book and it’s going to introduce the best character ever, a tough kitty named Master Of Cumming.  The book is going through a final edit and I’m not ready to release it yet, but I thought it would be cool to post this exclusive excerpt for all my fans:

“Tell me about your dreams,”  Hot Witch said as she poured some Frankenberry cereal into Master Of Cumming’s bowl.

 

“It was like Mysterious Skin,” Master Of Cumming said, “when that kid’s getting raped by his baseball coach, and it’s like he’s throwing Corn Pops all over him and it’s like a rain of kid cereals.  And it’s all colorful. That’s the dream I had, except it was Frankenberry, and Count Chocula, and Boo Berry. It was a rain of monster cereal all over me. And there was this girl there in a pink princess dress and she kissed me and smeared lipstick all over my fur and said “I don’t love you’. I felt hurt and started crying.  Then I woke up and was like What the fuck I don’t have feelings, I’m the toughest kitty ever. It’s like in the dream world I knew what love felt like even though in real life I’m not a pussy.”

 

Hot Witch got up from the table, took a box of Boo Berry down from the shelf, and poured herself a bowl.  

 

The tape playing Mazzy Star faded into Teenage Dream by Katy Perry and Master Of Cumming’s fur fluffed out in excitement.  

 

Hot Witch started playing around on her tits and making her cleavage all pushed together and she was like, “You think my cleavage looks good today?”

I will be posting links as soon as Call Me By Your AIDS is available!  Please comment below and let me know what you think of the excerpt!