The Fault In Our Meows

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The Fault In Our Meows is a book I wrote about a kitty who becomes suicidal after his owner commits suicide.

Overall this is a pretty suicidal book.  If you’re interested in purchasing a copy just find my books link in the Pussy Tantrum menu.

You could tell Rose Byrne was sad but she didn’t want to cry in front of all these guys, but she made the grumpiest face ever.

Then Rose Byrne was in a room with all these guys with shiny buttons on their shirts, and they had guns and one guy was like, “Sorry Mr. Rose Byrne but catching these criminals is totally impossible, it was too random.”

But Rose Byrne was like, “I want justice!  You cops suck!  I should totally clean up this city myself.”

“You can’t buy guns in this city Rose Byrne,” the cop said, and he had a mustache and was like, “Be a good Rose Byrne and go home.  Find a new wife.  You can’t just go around totally getting revenge.  It’s not like you have a death wish or something.”

“Humph!” Rose Byrne said, “Maybe I do have a death wish.  I used to be a totally liberal accountant and think that criminals needed fair trials, but my family’s murder changed me.  Now I totally need to get revenge so I can feel happy again.”

Then in another scene Rose Byrne was on vacation in Texas for some reason, and this guy in a cowboy hat was like, “Y’all are cool Rose Byrne.  Here’s a gun I got y’all as a gift.”

Then the guy gave Rose Byrne the giantest gun ever.  And then the rest of the movie Rose Byrne walked around New York shooting bad people with her gun, and her face looked totally happy, and even her sad Rose Byrne eyes looked happy, and she made a finger-gun with her hand and pointed it out the screen at us, like me and the bird were bad guys she was gonna shoot, then it was the end…

On the way out of the theater Kittles heard the fat guy complaining to the girl in the ticket booth.

Ghostly Ellis-Bextor

My latest book Ghostly Ellis-Bextor is about to drop on every EBook platform except Amazon (since I was banned from Amazon for life).

Ghostly Ellis-Bextor was inspired by the British pop star Sophie Ellis-Bextor and it’s an awesome book if you like stories about pyschotic kitties, abusive spooky ghosts, and mean puppies.

If you’re not familiar with Sophie Ellis-Bextor you should check out her video below:

And if you’d like a copy of Ghostly Ellis-Bextor just click on the picture below:

kittyglitter

The Legend Of Wesley Crusher: Teenage Fuck Machine

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In the winter of 2012 I published my first book on Kindle, it was called Wesley Crusher: Teenage Fuck Machine.

The publication of this book made me be one of the most famous writers in the world for about fifteen minutes, this proves that Andy Warhol’s theory that everyone will have fifteen minutes of fame is actually true.

Here is a list of articles and other links relating to the Wesley Crusher: Teenage Fuck Machine historical event:

iO9: Behold Wesley Crusher: Teenage F*** Machine, the Amazon Kindle’s new hottest book

Wesley Crusher: Teenage Fuck Machine [an audiobook]

The Phenomena of “Wesley Crusher: Teenage F*** Machine”

When Dirty Star Trek Fanfiction Becomes A Runaway Best Seller: An Interview With Kitty Glitter

On That Wesley Crusher Smut-Book

My Bizarre Interview With Amazon Bestseller and Catfish Kitty Glitter

Kitty Glitter Author of “Wesley Crusher Teenage F#ck Machine”!!!

Kitty Glitter will hit you like a steampunk catapult!” by Choire Sicha March 8, 2012

A Purrfect storm – Kitty Glitter Interview

Best book ever? Wesley Crusher: Teenage F#ck Machine

Spotlight on … Kitty Glitter Wesley Crusher: Teenage Fuck Machine (2012) * Dennis Cooper’s Blog